…and you wake up laughing

In Florida a while back, I’d just finished my morning swim and was sitting in the sun admiring the magnificent trees in back of my sister’s place.

I closed my eyes for a moment to focus on the warmth and there was a sudden swirl of white fur and husband. They were all mixed up, my little Boo* and Mike, and the feeling that came with the vision was joyous and comforting.

When I found this Rumi quote years ago, I hung onto it though I was wrecked by grief at the time. Death would bring relief from this devastation? If true, I couldn’t wait.

What I didn’t know was that there could be a (living) death of old ways of thinking, of thought patterns that kept me sleepy and miserable.

To wake up to the truth in this human life is to know our loved ones are always with us, to feel the ongoing presence of a husband, a little dog, and know they’re not lost to me. They can’t be. Ever.

And yes, it’s to wake up laughing, because coming to know the truth is so spectacular, it changes everything. Death to the old human paradigm. Hello to living in This-Awareness. And thank you. Thank you to my parents, to Brenda, to Grace, Ann Marie, and Sherri. Thank you to Mike and to Boo, my teachers who’ve gone before me.

Not too long ago, in the midst of a long chat with a friend (Raven💞), Mike came through saying, “I want you to experience me as I am now.” In meditation a couple of days later, I asked him to show me, and there was a sudden burst of light. It was pink and blue and pulsing with aliveness. Immense, all encompassing, pure love, and in the midst of it, Mike-ness. Always that, and so much more.

As are we all.

So very grateful today for this knowing, this certainty. I’d never have imagined such joy could arise out of such pain.

Nine years ago today I heard the last beat of my husband’s heart. It was profound, ruinous, crushing.

That silence. I thought it was the end.

It wasn’t.

Mike Cly, 8/8/1952-9/23/2012

*Boo, the second love of my life, went Home July 16.

13 thoughts on “…and you wake up laughing

  1. Wow!! Thanks for sharing your heart, soul and experience of it all!!!
    ❤️🌈🦋
    “Death is not the end” as our dear friend Sandy says….😘

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  2. I love this Lynette! It’s d beautifully written and speaks to my evolving trust in my angels. Recently they have truly woken me up! Much love to you ❤️

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  3. This is beautifully written Lynette! Angels are definitely in my life and helping me become more and more aware of their presence. It’s awesome❤️

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  4. Thank you so much for this! I lost my son, husband and “Oreo” within a one month period, almost 3 years ago. I still struggle some days, but most days I try to have your perspective. Their perspective. I love the “death of the old way of thinking”❤️

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  5. Well, you’ve done it again Lynette, made me cry. Just for a moment, but it came with a smile! Been awhile since I had a “moment” remembering the truth about my son and how good he is now. You are certainly worth the wait:) Stay well and HAPPY!

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  6. Once again, your words are a comforting reminder that all is well. Sometimes, when we’re in the thick of thin things (Fear, and all that comes with it), it’s hard to remember what we know (Love, and all that comes with it), even/especially when we don’t know that we know. Thank you for the reminder of the importance of treating our beliefs (things we think we know) as hypotheses’, growing in new ways (born again), with new information, and dying to old ways that are no longer supported in Truth. Let’s keep shining our Light! #Grateful
    InJoy,
    Tim

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  7. Thank you, lost my spouse 13 weeks ago, some days are so bad many times it seems i can’t continue this journey without him. Thanks for sharing

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  8. Such a beautiful story, Lynette! Beautifully written! Thank you for sharing this! I met you at the 2nd Wholy You retreat in June – I am Linda, maker of the bookmarks! I am thrilled that Suzanne shared this link to your post. Sending you so much love!

    Liked by 1 person

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