and on this day, Mike died

I was huddled in the corner of the room crying, a blanket over my head. Brenda was next to me in an ER bed, crying from pain. In the midst of chaos and sorrow, a shiny sign from my dead husband. And only hours later, we were laughing so hard the nurses shushed us. “All our darkness will turn to light.” It’s true.

hold on

"Many people I know and love are weeping and some are rejoicing. We *are* the yin-yang symbol being expressed in this human realm. And in each of us, elements of the other, and all of us making up the whole."

the web: gift from a dead husband in 6 parts

“That was the thing in that dusty old building. It was the little something extra in the web Mike was weaving, a little lagniappe that led me to the certainty that these events weren’t simply by chance…”

trust. your. self.

The Audubon guide said “I’ve never seen anything like it. Never. Not this close. Not this early. Not in these numbers. It’s unbelievable.” Only it’s not. Love landed three birds before us and they were a magnet for the rest. Our belief lands the gifts our people send us, and our acceptance is a magnet for more. Trust. Your. Self. Just do it.

breathe in: a gift

There are countless ways our loved ones in spirit let us know they’re still right here. One of my husband’s favorite is sending scents. There is magic afoot in the world if we open our hearts and minds — and breathe in.

ambulance, husband, gift

“I was running around town this morning when I heard a siren and saw an ambulance with lights swirling in my rear view mirror.
I pulled over to allow it passage and as I watched it speeding down Harvard, I burst into tears.”

ch-ch-ch-changes

I've spent the summer completing the most monumental task, one I never actually dreamed I could finally put to rest. I have written almost nothing in that time but on this day that I'm finally done, this memory popped up on Facebook. It's fitting, because two years ago when I wrote this, I'd just finished … Continue reading ch-ch-ch-changes

whales, dogs, love, light

The whales' performance told me that. My husband confirmed the message. The sunbeam in my hands was a promise that nothing has changed in the last year, despite everything changing. It's so hard sometimes to quiet the roar of earthly life, but when we do, it's all right there: comfort, assurance, certainty, unbreakable connection. Reason to relax and just be. Truly, all is so very, very well. We are safe, held in a love beyond what we can begin to comprehend in our humanness. Trust. Everything's okay, even when it doesn't always feel like it.